Other people admitting their depression and suicidal thoughts/actions does absolutely nothing for me. I don't care that other people have "been there before." I don't give a damn about anyone else's story. Nothing anyone says is uplifting or even particularly relevent. I DON'T RELATE TO YOU FUCKING PEOPLE.
Furthermore, I don't care how anyone else will feel if I'm dead. Honestly, my ability to care about the feelings of others is largely based on how it impacts me. I'm a selfish prick, after all.
When I feel like I want to die, the reasons I don't kill myself are
a) part of me is convinced things will improve
and
b) I'm scared I'll fuck it up somehow and not die.
That said, at some point I'll probably go through with it. When I do:
To my parents: I'm sorry I was a failure.
To anyone who considered me a friend: Obviously, I gave up. Sorry if this hurts your feelings, but you might have noticed that (regardless of how much I may have liked you) I really only ever cared about myself. Consider this the final proof.
To those I loved and/or who loved me: Sorry I failed you. I tried.
To anyone I hurt: I'm sorry. That wasn't my intention.
That's all I've got right now.
- Who Cares?
diabhol- September 25th, 2016
- Writer's Block: Blast to the past
- diabhol
- September 9th, 2011
If you could travel back in time, what would you tell your 10-year-old self?
Ask for help so you can finish school. Either stay in Los Angeles as long as you can or come back as soon as possible. Get on a budget.
- From Twitter 05-14-2011
- diabhol
- May 15th, 2011
- 02:14:49: Nice try, asshole. Next time try *not* using a fake ID and what I presume is a stolen credit card. #busted!
- 02:16:04: $100 in merch that includes a carton of cigs is also a giveaway. Hope you get raped in prison, fucker. #busted!
- 02:29:28: @DJtightyWhitey Nah, but he's stupid. It'l happen.
- 07:09:27: There's literally nothing I want more than to firebomb my store after shooting everyone inside it. FUCK YOU PEOPLE. #dieinafire #retailsucks
- 19:58:00: RT @jurassicalien Very happy to see Treme get a 3rd season pick up. Very happy indeed.
Tweets copied by twittinesis.com
- From Twitter 05-13-2011
- diabhol
- May 14th, 2011
- 03:31:21: I'd like to thank @Kogi for being at 4100 at 10pm (instead of 10:30pm), so I could have one of their awesome spicy pork burritos for lunch.
- 07:26:53: When your home is...overpopulated, it's interesting how your car tends to become your refuge away from people.
- 20:11:19: Going radio silent for Smallville!
Tweets copied by twittinesis.com
- From Twitter 05-11-2011
- diabhol
- May 12th, 2011
- 14:02:05: #MONKFISH!
- 20:38:21: Ok, two double Greyhounds is enough for one evening before work. #AustinsBar
- 21:02:55: @okaythanksbye Oh yes...quite. Haven't had dinner yet.
Tweets copied by twittinesis.com
- From Twitter 05-09-2011
- diabhol
- May 10th, 2011
- 00:56:28: Someone once told me I should take the test to be a pharmacy tech. Pharmacy customers make me question that idea.
- 06:47:54: Unbefuckinglievable. I gotta wear a fuckin' shirt & tie, now? This is bullshit.
- 08:53:04: RT @Mughis_hairball: 61 years ago today L.Ron Hubbard published Dianetics. Thanks a fucking bunch for th
- 15:21:56: Crap; doctor's office doesn't validate parking. This is going to *suck*.
- 15:57:58: Apparently I'm visiting the urologist to the stars.
Tweets copied by twittinesis.com
- From Twitter 05-08-2011
- diabhol
- May 9th, 2011
- 06:14:17: Everyone who says they don't shop here is a fucking liar.
- 07:41:53: @acomicbookgirl About 90% of the shitheads who won't take a fucking card.
- 08:15:08: I gotta get the fuck outta this fuckin' flat before I fuckin' kill everyone else who fuckin' lives here. #homelife
- 13:05:41: Four fuckin' hours and I'm awakened by the chatter and foot traffic of idiots. #killthemall
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- From Twitter 05-07-2011
- diabhol
- May 8th, 2011
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- From Twitter 05-06-2011
- diabhol
- May 7th, 2011
Tweets copied by twittinesis.com
- From Twitter 05-05-2011
- diabhol
- May 6th, 2011
- 03:43:45: The STP cover of "Dancin' Days" is actually better the original Zeppelin. Fuck anyone who disagrees. :)
- 03:57:25: It's official: celebrities can no longer be allowed to name their own kids. #mariahsthelaststraw
- 04:05:10: ARGH! NO MORE #CURLING TALK! *meltdown* #crt #hatecurling
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